By October 31, 2018 0 Comments Read More →

Which Edward Gorey Archetype Are You? Take Our Dreary Quiz!

It is once again Halloween, a day for the high-spirited of the world to dabble in the dark and peculiar. But you, lonely soul, of little means and littler purpose, in furtive moustache or eccentric dress, find yourself facing yet another day of banal horror. To get yourself in the holiday spirit, you may perhaps subject yourself to a party or two—but alas, your eccentric prophecies and occasional self-flagellation seldom find an audience. Perhaps you might take a walk near the marsh, pondering the squandering of your inheritance as you take in the putrid air while followed by a mysterious stranger. The night is yours for the taking, the gentle wailing of the aging ballerina next door a mellifluous accompaniment to a night of solitary reflection in your windowless apartment. As the common person chooses today to become someone else, you, outlier in all things strange and uncommon, elect instead to answer, once and for all, the question: Who are you?

 

1. Choose your dream domicile.

 

2. What is your ideal repast?

a) A sumptuous pheasant with a large glass of cooking sherry.

b) A crust of bread softened and seasoned by your own tears.

c) Just three sardines, please.

d) A dish of milk and some savory fish bones.

 

3. Which best describes your childhood?

 

4. Choose an outfit.

 

5. Choose a demise.

 

Your Gorey archetype is . . .

 

Mostly A’s: Sir Lloyd

No one can be quite sure where you came from, or whom you know—you arrived to the costume party with a small parcel and at half past two and show no sign of leaving. It can be supposed you are a funny old uncle of the hostess, and you have since been seen giving her succulents a good watering with very expensive gin.

 

Mostly B’s: Poor Unfortunate

Oh, poor dear, you thought you were someone important, did you?

 

Mostly C’s: Cleo

It is often said of you that you are quite stylish, you mysterious coquette, you. You read something quite nasty in the tarot cards today, but you wander off with the shifty gent in the bowler hat anyway.

 

Mostly D’s: Cat

Which cat? Any cat. All cats. You are legion. You belong to the mystical order of felines. You represent the ineffable catness of the thing.

Comments

comments

awolin@ala.org'

About the Author:

Ada Wolin is a recent graduate of the School of the Art Institute of Chicago, where she received a BFA in writing. If she's not reading, she's probably hanging out with her cats, listening to music (loudly), or watching old movies. Or some combination of the three.

Post a Comment